final argument

Visual 2

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It won't all upload for some reason and I have been trying for an hour. The word JUSTICE in big bold letters after the three dots will not show up and the alignment is all messed up. I've tried saving it in many different programs but it just will not work so I guess this is the best that it is going to get.



For essay, I made an argument in favor of the death penalty and how it should be authorized in all 50 States, because currently only 38 States have done so. I set up the arguments or essay by first putting an opposition argument and then using facts and information to contradict the opposing side, therefore proving the statement incorrect. This is a very difficult topic to write about, I later learned, because there are many biases that exist as well as people that are going to think one way no matter what. My first drafts of my paper included the morality of the death penalty, but I changed it to solely focus on how the death penalty should become law since there were previously inconsistencies in my paper.
Taking into account that my argument is focused on all 50 States authorizing the death penalty for means of punishing murderers, I think the most appropriate audience to aim my visual argument at would be political people, more specifically lawmakers. This is because they are ultimately the ones that can make decisions or bring about concrete change. I considered directing my visual argument toward the general population since it is them that would potentially vote on the issue, but I decided that political people are the most appropriate and could make the most impact. It was harder for me to figure out the most effective medium to display my visual argument. I think the best place would be have it printed on some sort of political document, like a bulletin or newsletter, which politicians and lawmakers receive. This way the visual has a greater chance to be seen by lawmakers. I considered an advertisement board outside of their office as a potential location for my visual argument. If I were to have it displayed on an advertising board, there is a smaller chance that lawmakers or even people in general would actually stop to look at it and take the message into consideration. Many people pass by advertisement boards with only the slightest glance and not even taking the time to think about what it may mean.
While trying to decide the audience and medium in which to display my visual argument, I learned that is it much harder than I previously expected. As the creator of such an assignment, I wanted the picture to be accurate and appropriate for the audience. Also, making it appealing to those people that it is directed at is important and should be taken into consideration when deciding the composition of the specific argument and message. Finally, deciding on a medium that was visible and accessible to the audience without being too narrow or broad was a tough decision. In this case, I wanted to make sure I was covering the entire audience but not including those that it is not intended for.
In order to properly change my essay into a visual argument, I obviously could not include all factors that I brought up in my essay. I had to decide on exactly how to portray my argument without making it too complicated so that there was too much going on and the message would have gotten lost. I also did not want it to be too simple that it would be ineffective because the message would too difficult to comprehend and pick up on.
For my visual argument, I chose to first have a picture of gravestones in a small cemetery. Over the top of this picture the words ‘How would you feel if this was YOUR family member?’ are displayed. This section of my visual attempts to appeal to the audience’s emotions, or integrating the pathos mode of persuasion. I put YOUR in all capital letters to try to make it more personal and direct the person to think of his/herself in the situation and how he/she would feel if his/her family member was murdered.
Secondly, I added a picture of a bed in which lethal injection takes place. Above this picture, I wrote …JUSTICE, to show that the death penalty should be the method of punishment for murderers. This could add to the pathos as well because the person is thinking about how he/she would feel if his/her family member was murdered and then he/she sees a picture of what would happen to the murderer which would hopefully appeal to his/her emotions and therefore make the person feel more strongly about the issue if he/she previously did not. Also, this could give a person a different perspective if he/she had never thought about it from the viewpoint of his/herself in the situation. Underneath this picture are the words MAKE IT LAW. I bolded LAW to try to really make my point of how it should be made a law and make sure the correct message was portrayed. Also, I think it is most likely the last thing that the viewer would look at in the visual, leaving it stuck in his/her mind.
At first, I was planning on using a picture of an electric chair to portray the death penalty aspect because it is more obvious than the lethal injection bed. Also, the death penalty and electric chairs are often associated with one another. Therefore, the visual could be figured out quickly, as if someone was just walking by. When I decided to change my medium to a political document, I changed the electric chair picture to a bed in which lethal injection takes place. The first picture of a cemetery implies that people are lying dead in their graves, as blunt as that may sound. Ironically, the second picture shows a bed in which is the murderer would lie down to their death. By pointing this out, I think it shows that the punishment IS in fact fair and what should become law because the punishment is paralleling the crime.
Throughout the process of making my visual, I found out how important color and placement of objects may be. I observed my classmates visual arguments because it was an easy way to compare what was effective and what was not. Also, I tried to pick out what stuck out to me and had a greater effect on me and figured out why such things did so. I used the least amount of words as possible so as to not distract the viewer from the message and make it quick and easy to read. Pictures are also more appealing than a bunch of words. I added double black lines around the outside of my visual to make it stick out. I think using bold and capital letters also helped show more emphasis.

visually rhetorically so

This is an image that I came across accidentally but I realized that it seems to be perfect for this assignment of finding a picture portraying visual rhetoric. It depicts the comparison of Apple / Mac Books versus computers that run on Windows or in other words, a PC vs. a Mac. It uses a visual metaphor (if that is possible) by using cars to represent computer systems in order to get the intended message across. Windows is represented by an old, crappy car with a very complicated ‘engine.’ The mechanic that is working on the car looks exhausted as well as confused, not knowing what to do with all the loose cords and cables that are coming out of the car. On the other hand, the Mac is represented by a car that is definitely much newer, updated and futuristic. The engine is extremely simple with only an off and on switch. The mechanic for this car is also very happy with a smug smile on his face and standing up tall as he looks across toward the other car.
The main argument of the picture is that Macs are much simpler, newer, and more visually appealing than PCs. This is apparent because of, first of all and most obvious, the car that is assigned to represent each side of the argument. The brown and less valuable car makes the Windows PC seem like it is a cheap computer that is very complicated and almost not doable for the user. The Mac’s car is white and shiny with a design that is modern and up-to-date. The simplicity of the engine gives the appeal to a customer or onlooker that the Mac Books are much easier to use and to keep up with. Color is a very strong factor in the argument and plays into the message. The Windows side displays brown tones and dull neutral colors which give it less appeal. The Mac side is just the opposite. The car, the mechanic, AND the Apple symbol not only all match, but use white and bright blue to draw more attention to it and is more overall pleasing to the eye.
When I first looked at this image, the large Apple and Windows symbols were the first things that I noticed. Next, my eyes moved toward the right side of the image because of the bright colors used, or the half that represents the Apple Mac Books. The position of the objects also helps convey the comparison more vividly since the image is basically split down the middle. If the picture was changed so that all objects were one solid color or only the outisde edge that contrasts with the white background was visible, it would seem like there were only two objects in the picture meaning that the objects that are touching show that they correlate or go together. The symmetry of the picture also help point out that the main intent of the picture is to compare two alike concepts because it uses fairly equal objects in terms of type of object, size and proportion. The quality of the car Is where the difference is apparent and main argument comes out.
I found this image from a place that was displaying the picture, not from the original website, so I do not know who released or created it. Nonetheless, the picture is aimed at the audience that is looking to buy and own a computer. Technically, the computer-buying/owning population is a large one. Anywhere from 10-year-old to 70-year-old people can and do own computers. Considering this, the picture is most likely not directed at those on the extreme ends of the population considering they probably do not buy the computer for themselves. Also, this picture probably does not mean anything (besides having two cars in it) to a 10-year-old because they would not know about the ongoing argument between Mac Books and Windows operating systems.
Finally, I think this picture is effective and I do not even agree with the portrayed message. Personally, I like Windows PCs much better than Mac Books but that is fairly irrelevant. If I did not have very much prior knowledge of the subjects, I would find this picture very convincing. The message is conveyed clearly and simply without any words involved. It uses equivalent comparisons that most anyone would understand.

very rough drafttt

Kylie Pont
Ms. Sowa
Writing as Inquiry
12 Nov 2008
The Media Affects

This is a very rough draft for my paper. I know my length needs help as well as content but this is the main idea of my paper so far and where the argument is taking it. I need to extend the opposition arguments as well to help my paper. I also need to properly cite my sources both in the text and create a works cited page, but that is yet to come.
The media: a tool that is used to store and deliver information to a very large audience. This is a very common definition that your average person might come up with when asked, what is the media? What many people do not realize is that strong biases and opinions of what is right and wrong are depicted in many ways and through many sources of the media. Newspapers, TV Shows, movies, magazines, and the internet are the most commonly used forms of media (National Institute). The real question of the matter is how much effect does the media have on the people, or the viewers and readers, of our society?
Body image is an individual’s perception of their own body. There are many factors that may affect how a person views themselves from an outside perspective, including family life and self-esteem, but there is no doubt that the media plays a very large role in the matter. The media, by constantly showing the ‘100 Hottest Women’ and ’50 Sexiest Males’ on top of pictures and pictures of skinny girls and bulky guys, gives a viewer or reader the false perception of what they ‘should’ look like (kidshealth). Magazines are a main source to blame for the unrealistic appearance that so many women strive to achieve, size 4 in the hips, size 2 in the waist, and size 10 in the bust (predictors). Few people are aware that is thin-ideal body type is genetically impossible for most all women to attain (predictors). So why do females across the country go to great lengths to achieve such an unrealistic goal?
A person that is regularly exposed to media images is constantly being reminded of what the celebrities of the time look like, how skinny they are, and how much weight they have lost. An easy thing to do is compare yourself to such people, sometimes without even realizing you are doing so. Although, in a perfect world, these images would not affect the people seeing them, but as we all know, it does not quite work like that. Body dissatisfaction starts at a very early age. In a survey of girls aged nine and ten years old, 40% have attempted to lose weight in some fashion, that means 4th and 5th grade girls, not even out of elementary school yet, are already self conscious of their body before most have even fully developed (National Institute). Not only this, but another report has shown that at age 13, 53% of American girls are “unhappy with their bodies” (National Institute). Just a short four years later, the percentage of unhappy girls, has jumped from a 53% to an overwhelming 78%. Over three-fourths of the US female population are not satisfied with their weight or body image already, before even leaving high school. The origins of this wide-spread dissatisfaction are directly linked to the media, and in many cases, more specifically television. Teen-age girls who have viewed TV commercials that depict women who display the unrealistic thin-ideal body type have caused them to feel less confident, angrier and more dissatisfied with their own weight and appearance (National Insititute).
Although it is arguable that there are many other factors that affect a young girls’ perception of her body including family life, self-esteem, and peers, many of these could easily be linked back to the media in some way.

http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/body_image/body_image.html

http://www.mediafamily.org/facts/facts_mediaeffect.shtml

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa3852/is_200401/ai_n9352674/print?tag=artBody;co11

Reading Response #4

In the first essay I read, Is Privacy Overrated? The Merits, Drawbacks, and Inevitability of the Surveillance Nation by Katherine Mangu-Ward makes two claims, but they sort of tie together. First of all, she makes the point that the value of security and convenience outweighs the need and right to privacy in terms of public video surveillance. She talks about how the security that the video cameras provide is put to much greater use, deemed more important, and has been much more beneficial than the argument of people being tracked and viewed innocently as they walk through the streets of downtown. Another claim that the author makes is that we are in an age of zero privacy, so having the public video surveillance is not a big deal and hardly represents a new invasion of privacy. Through credit cards, EZ Passes, and bank records a person’s identity and information is already in jeopardy and by no means ‘private.’ In this essay/article, there is no place that she uses citations or sources, which leads me to believe that the information is coming from personal knowledge and experience, although it would surprise me that someone would just know some of this information off the top of their head. Katherine Mangu-Ward does seem to be creditable after reading the short paragraph about her at the end of the essay. Nonetheless, I think the facts and experiences she presents support her claims and lead to me to side with her on both issues. She gives strong examples of how video surveillance has and does benefit people (pg. 13), one of them being how video cameras helped several protesters beat charges of resisting arrest. After reading the essay, I agree with the arguments she made, maybe because I did not know very much about this topic nor have much of an opinion prior to reading it.
In the second essay I read, Reclaiming “Abandoned” DNA: The Fourth Amendment and Genetic Privacy, by Elizabeth E. Joh, makes the claim of police using abandoned DNA without the consent of the individual. Everyone, without knowing it, leaves traces of their genetic identity, whether it be licking a stamp or the seal of an envelope, or as simple as handling change (pg. 30). With police being able to use abandoned DNA, people lose the ability to protect their genetic information. Again, the research presented in this article is not cited, but I believe the author is credible considering the information and the ending biography. The facts and examples presented in this article are influential and help support the author’s claim. There are multiple cases and examples that are presented in the article. In the case of Adolph Laudenberg (pg. 31), the use of abandoned DNA is what ultimately causes him to be charged with murders from decades before. Is this legal or does it violate Laudenberg’s rights? According the essay, there has never been a court that has help police collection of abandoned DNA illegal (pg. 32). Prior to reading this article, I knew some information regarding the use of discarded DNA, but Joh’s article put it in a new perspective for me. It showed me that not only does the law permit it, but police seek it and use it to their advantage.
In Ben Quarmby’s excerpt, The Case for National DNA Identification Cards, the author makes the claim that National Identification Cards could potentially be introduced into the United States and without too much public opposition. People seem to believe that giving up your finger print and other personal genetic information is relatively unsubstantial as compared to potentially terminating the threat of terrorism within our country (pg. 37). I did not think this essay was very strong and it really did not influence me. There was not a lot of factual information to back up his claim, maybe because the essay itself was fairly short. I did not have any prior knowledge of these ID cards before the article, but I feel more informed then persuaded after reading it.
In the fourth essay, Putting a Price on Nature by Drenner, the author makes a very strong point. The main claim of the article is that although the need for oil is high, the government should not drill for oil in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge (ANWR). Drenner points out the many negative effects of drilling in the ANWR, for example, how much land it would take up and how many other things would have to be built including roads, airplanes, electric plants, and pumping stations (pg. B64) This article was very persuasive and really influenced me. It gave many different arguments and research supporting the claim. One example that really stuck out was the 1989 Exxon Valdez spill (pg. B64). Eleven million gallons of oil spilled causing death to thousands of animals and many environmental problems. Also, another factor that the author used was giving the arguments of the opposing side and then, using research and facts, he shows the inefficiencies of the opposition. Prior to reading this article, I did not have very much background on the topic, but my opinion has stayed the same throughout. I think the wildlife refuge should be saved and this article definitely continues this belief. I think it would be better to find other sources instead of oil or maybe a different location but the ANWR should be kept how it is. It is one of the last large refuges and drilling for oil will have irreversible lasting effects. This was a very well written argument essay

Reading Response 3

I found both of these essays, The Cave by Jon Katz and Mary Kay: American Dream in a Bottle by Tammy Anderson, to be very interesting because both were ethnography papers about topics that I did not know very much about as well as helpful for my own ethnography paper.
The Cave definitely exhibited many of the traits that were talked about in Chapter 10. The ‘Features of the Form,’ in particular, again helped me identify what exactly should be in an ethnography essay. The characters in The Cave identify themselves as members of the Geek World, which is the first feature of the form that Ballenger talks about for ethnography essays. Also, the setting of the essay, The Cave, or the airless two-bedroom apartment in a dank stucco-and-brick complex on the outskirts of Caldwell, is where the author observes them. He vividly describes the scene as well as how Jesse and Eric interact with it. Much of the essay gives specific examples of the environment in which nearly all of their time is spent, for example, the exact make and model of both of the computers that these two geeks’ lives revolve around. Another feature of the form that this essay exhibits is the subjective nature that the author adds. Although there are many details that are objective, he makes assumptions, opinions, and remarks of what he is observing from his point of view. For example (pg B47): “It was evidently second nature by now, which explained why he looked as if he hadn’t been out in the sun for years. “
Tammy Anderson also displays the features of the form in her essay Mary Kay: American Dream in a Bottle. The main focus is definitely on the members of the Mary Kay cult. She gives such vivid descriptions of the women that call themselves Mary Kay consultants you can feel the same emotion the author is going through. Tammy Anderson has also observed this group over time because she talks about how she has been confronted about becoming a consultant herself many times in the past as well as that she has attended the meetings numerous times prior to the one the essay revolves around. This also goes along with setting because the majority of the paper is written about when she was either in the presence of a consultant or at the actual meeting. Finally, subjectivity is used in this ethnography paper. Tammy rants about her opinions of the ladies and the Mary Kay lifestyle. For example, (pg. 58): “As I continued to scrutinize the ladies, I began to feel I could tell those who had not been selling Mary Kay very long.”
I have already mentioned a few examples of how the authors describe the aspects of the culture, but there are many more than just those. For example, The Cave uses specific detail of the character-setting interaction. (pg. B47) “Anyone could have come into the apartment and carted away everything in it, except for the computer, and Jesse wouldn’t have noticed or perhaps cared that much.” In Mary Kay: American Dream in a Bottle, the author goes on and on about the personas and personalities of the Mary Kay consultants. For example, (pg. B56) “..overzealous, relentlessly optimistic Mary Kay consultants”, and (pg. B57) “I knew enough about Mary Kay to know I would encounter an air of excitement and almost unrealistic enthusiasm.”
Both of these authors interpret the cultures they are studying from their own perspective which kind of goes along with the openly subjective feature of the form. They naturally create their own opinions that come out in the texts. (pg. B48) “At times hurt and anger radiated from them like heat rising from Idaho blacktop in the sun,” and (pg. B49) “Despite the name of the club that so shaped them, there was nothing nerdy about them. Both were tough, smart, resilient, and independent” are both examples of how Jon Katz interprets the characters, or members of the culture. There are also lines from Tammy Anderson’s essay that shows her comments on the Mary Kay ladies, (pg. B57) “I observed the women in attendance, and saw that they were predominantly very excited, friendly, and eager,” and (pg. B59) “they certainly seemed to believe the words they spoke.”
In Mary Kay: American Dream in a Bottle, she uses research to give background information on Mary Kay the person, the company, and the tradition. She gives details that help me as a reader follow her story and be able to truly understand the culture in which she is observing. I felt fully connected to the essay because there was factual information, details about the events, and voice from the author. My potential topic is video games and the people of all ages who have taken up this hobby. I could do research on the history of video gaming as well as give information about the different games that I observe people playing. This will help the readers fully understand the culture that I am writing about and make for a better paper. It will also help display why this group is set apart from the norm, since it is not a group with specific boundaries and titles.

Sources

"More Sleep, Less Fat." Scientific American 298.4 (Apr. 2008): 34-34. Academic Search Complete. EBSCO. [Library name], [City], [State abbreviation]. 29 Sep. 2008.

Scientific American, April 2008, claims that Lack of shut-eye contributes to the risk of obesity. This article presents a study of children and the increase in odds of being overweight if child sleeps less than recommended time. This article was intended to educate people and was published in book, Volume 298, so it could be in a textbook for college students. This article purpose’s is to inform readers, so that their children do not fall into the problem. The content of this article will help enhance my essay because it has a real study with results, showing the effects, and answering my question.

Yoo, Seung-Schik, et al. "The human emotional brain without sleep — a prefrontal amygdala disconnect." Current Biology 17.20 (23 Oct. 2007): R877-R878. Academic Search Complete. EBSCO. [Library name], [City], [State abbreviation]. 29 Sep. 2008

The human emotional brain without sleep — a prefrontal amygdala disconnect, by Yoo, Seung-Schik, 23 Oct. 2007, states that Sleep deprivation is known to impair a range of functions. This article presents information over topics such as how immune regulation and metabolic control are effected by lack of sleep. This article is intended for education and is published in a science book, so again it could be for college students. The purpose of this article is to inform readers, making them aware of the negative effects sleep deprivation has on the body. This article is definitely relevant to my question and the facts stated in it will help answer it.


Hillard, Kate. “The Effects of Sleep Deprivation.” PageWise. 2002. 28 Sep 2008
Kate Hillard’s article “The Effects of Sleep Deprivation” from 2002 states that sleep deprivation is a huge problem all over the world. The author talks about the effects on the individual’s mind, body, and emotions, presenting facts backing each one. This article is intended for education of the general population and a person of any age. This article’s purpose is to inform readers of all ages of the negative effects sleep deprivation has on an individual. The information will add to me essay because not only does it talk about the effects, but it brings up the problem, why it is occurring, and what will happen in the future.

Reading Response #2 (over the correct essay this time)

Both of the essays, Why Do People Tan? by Amy Garrett-Brown and An Experience in Acronyms by Jay Holmquist, were both discovery essays. They were very interesting for me to read and kept me wanting to read on throughout the entire essay in both cases.
The essay, Why Do People Tan? by Garrett-Brown, is a discovery essay. The author definitely has an initial question which creates the essay’s topic and she builds on it from there. There were a few lines in particular that stuck out that really proved the essay to be a discovery essay. “It struck me as I read the last lines of this sardonic critique of society that I don’t necessarily wonder why people tan, but why they completely gyp themselves of the pleasures of the sun to be rewarded with a battle with cancer at worst and saggy skin at best.” This shows how the author finds a new question after doing her research and it begins to answer it, showing her discovering information. Also, ‘it struck me’ relays the message of discovery perfectly. “So maybe that’s it, people just like the way it looks to be tan.” Here, the author is making conclusions from the information she has read and the research she has put forth. The last paragraph of the writing also indicates discovery because she states her final thoughts, even though the essay seems to suddenly cut off.
Although the essay, An Experience of Acronyms by Jay Holmquist, is about as completely different of a topic as possible, it too is a discovery essay. The author of this writing is more informative, giving the readers facts and information pertaining to the subject of drugs as well as personal experiences to back it up and giving it the discovery factor. Also, the lines that show ‘discovery’ in this essay are not as obvious, but there are still examples that lead you to easily classify the essay. Holmquist speaks of different occasions when he had done drugs and the experiences that came along with it. He then goes on to say, “I personally stopped my drug use about a year and a half ago. I was pretty much scared into it after I had to call an ambulance for Eric.” In the paragraph prior, the author admits, “The fact that these drugs are so dangerous, yet a lot of my friends do them, scares me.” A combination of these two examples shows that, even after doing these drugs, he now realizes the danger in them and has stopped his drug abuse because of it.
The overall controlling idea for Why Do People Tan? would be that Amy Garrett-Brown had an initial question, and through research, she came up with a few conclusions. Although the ending of the essay was fairly up in the air, she was able to come up with her own opinion as well as stated the views of a few others of why people really do tan, or ‘gyp themselves of the pleasures of the sun.’
The controlling idea of the essay, An Experience of Acronyms, is quite different. After taking hardcore drugs in his life, the author realized the harmful effects and truths about them and therefore stopped abusing drugs. The same lines that I used above would help support this idea, especially, “I personally stopped my drug use about a year and a half ago. I was pretty much scared into it after I had to call an ambulance for Eric.”
Both of these authors use research in their essays. In the first essay, there is not as much factual information presented as there is in the second one. The author relays the information in a more stating facts method but since there is not a lot of researched information, it does not get boring or lose sight of the main question of the essay.
The second essay is a very factual and informative essay, but still was very interesting for me to read. It was filled with statistics and explanations of three drugs, including LSD, MDMA, and GHB, that I never knew about them. Although this information was presented in a different way - he just stated the information because there was so much of it, I still think the author was successful in doing so because it did not seem like he just rambled one fact after another, but relayed pertinent information.
The two essays’ hold a few of the features of the form of research papers that Ballenger talks about on page 432. First of all, the research is driven by questions, especially the essay, Why Do People Tan? Also, the facts and researched information that are in both clearly relate to the initial topic and discovery item for both essays. There is not extra or irrelevant information. The sources for both essays are clearly given credit because there is a Works Cited or References at each of the ends. These writings do not meet all the features of the form criteria because they are not full research papers, but discovery essays instead.
After reading through Ballenger’s features of the form, it helped me pick out ways that I can write a discovery essay but still add factual and research information in order to enhance it. I realized that research needs to be driven by questions, to help get away from the stating facts which is boring and uninteresting to readers. Also, relating questions to what has been said is another important element to successful research. I have not decided yet what to write my essay on, but after reading both of these essays as well as Ballenger’s features of the form for research papers, hopefully I can successfully write my essay.

1) How does lack of sleep affect a person? (performance ability)
2) Why do people favor English/reading or math/sciences?
3) How good for you are taking daily naps?